I've been around babies and young children all my life, including my own children and grandchildren. Not all young ones enjoy being independent, and they'll let you do things for them until they're 35 years old, if you're willing. But there are others who like to try their wings at an early age. I have no idea how many times I've heard a little person say, "I do it MYSELF!" While they're often successful in their endeavors, just as often, I have had to hold the cup, tie the shoe, form the penciled letter, and clean up the mess after they had reached the point of utter frustration.
Countless times this past week, people have said to me, "Call when you need help with something. Don't feel like you have to do it yourself." To be honest, I enjoy the feeling of accomplishment I have when I've tackled a new job and conquered it. I like the feeling of independence when I can fix things myself without having to call for help. I like watching things form and take shape under my hands. So, I try not to call for help often. And it embarrasses me when I DO have to make that call.
However, I'm supposing there are limits. At least, that's what my body is telling me. I doubt I'm going to turn over a new leaf right away, but it's something I'm having to consider. Call for help? Yikes! Even typing it makes me nervous. My motto for years has been, "If you want a job done right, do it yourself!" Yes. I'm willing to admit that I'm just a bit rigid. A perfectionist? I've been told so, but I think there are far too many areas of imperfection in my life for that label to ever fit. Whatever my excuses, I'm going to have to consider making some life changes. Lots of people tell me they're willing to help out. Maybe I should give it a trial run.
I know, if Don's condition deteriorates (which has been long in coming, Thank God), I will be forced to step outside my comfort zone and let people into my little circle. I don't want to wear them out before that time comes, if it EVER comes. So I continue to put up light fixtures, replace brake bulbs in the car, repair leaky pipes, and install new faucets. Why? Because I CAN.
2 comments:
Hugs to you. You are awesome. You have also poured liove into many, many people who would be glad of the chance to share some of it back. You are a lovely and loved lady of grace.
Or like one of my nieces would say "I do it my BIG ol' self!!"
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